PART 1 of Mindset Matters: Are You Building A Prison Or A Palace?

(Mindset Matters is a series relating to mindset, challenging you to identify blockages or negative thinking patterns and, hopefully, it will be helpful in breaking those barriers to your thinking that may be limiting you in your everyday lives. LockyJ :)


PART 1

 Mindset Matters: Are You Building A Prison Or A Palace?


Having recently bought a house I have been "investing" in learning how to develop property, seeing as this is my first house and it certainly fits the "renovators dream" sales pitch!

Video's, blogs, books, and podcast that deal with home improvement, property development and the like I have been trying to devour, in order that I can make the most informed decisions for improvements I make.
So here I was the other day, I was listening to a podcast by a successful property developer, the podcast was all about how they went from nothing to the wildly successful billionaire they are today.

The interviewer was doing a great job, getting to the details of exactly HOW this person had made the moves they had and I was listening along trying to absorb it like a sponge in the sink.

All was going well and I was nodding along at all the right places, expressing the right amount of surprise at the right times when I suddenly HAD to STOP the podcast.

Why you ask?

I realised that whilst I might have been listening and absorbing all of the information, my inner dialogue was VERY NEGATIVE.

I found my inner voice saying things like:

 "Yeh but I can't do that".

 "He probably had more money to start up", 

"He didn't have the family to think of",

 "He lived with his parents at that stage", 

"'I am nowhere near where he is at that stage".

On and on it went, if my inner talk was speaking to me on the street I would walk away VERY quickly as I would identify how dangerous it is to have that attitude.

For every brick I was laying on the wall of self improvement, my self talk was tearing them down at the same rate.

So, I figured, that today I may have sat down to learn about building a house but in truth; I had to learn how to build the HOUSE of my Mind FIRST.

What was my self talk made up of at it's core?

I was giving myself all these "valid excuses" as to WHY I wasn't in the same place as the speaker, as to why it would be OK if I never made it to where he was. I guess my mind was TRYING to protect me from failure right?

Wrong!

My self talk was full of NEGATIVITY.

Since when has that ever lead to a POSITIVE OUTCOME?

It doesn't.

I know it.

You know it.

We all know it.

So why do we keep LIMITING our OPPORTUNITIES and ABILITIES?

There was NO POINT me listening to that podcast if  my HEAD was going to keep telling my HEART that I couldn't attain his lifestyle no matter HOW MANY skills I learnt.

Have you ever noticed this in your life?

It frustrated me, it really did. Here I was TRYING to learn and my MINDSET was holding me back.

Not Circumstance.

Not Situation.

Just my MINDSET.

It's like a starting a 100 metre sprint 5 yards behind everyone else.

You might want to win and you might try as hard as you like but YOU disadvantage yourself from the very START.


I don't know about you but I have realised that there is ONE common denominator in ALL the successful people in the world, one thing that they all do EXACTLY THE SAME.

It doesn't matter what business they have, their age, their gender, their race or any other factor, they ALL have this in common.


IT IS THEIR MINDSET!!

Where you and I see problems, they see possibilities.

When we see dead ends, they see detours.

When you and I doubt, they think DO IT!

It is a CHOICE, sure you might not think you have a choice, heck I wasn't even fully AWARE of my self talk as I sat their listening to that podcast.

But, make no mistake, it IS a choice.

I was CHOOSING to build a PRISON in my mind through my self talk, through the negativity and through my perspective.

Now, I don't know about you but I want to build a PALACE in my mind, I want to create a space where all my dreams get all they need to FLOURISH.


So, I hit the books and found 3 key concepts that help create that mindset, the mindset of a person who goes out and builds a life of their own CHOOSING. I am certain that there are A LOT more, but I feel that these 3 will help get YOU on the RIGHT TRACK.

Remember, in building ANYTHING the most important part is the FOUNDATION.

Building a powerhouse mindset is NO DIFFERENT.

Now, these 3 concepts may not seem to be directly related to your mindset, however, you need to create a space that ENCOURAGES self belief and DEMANDS that we start to build our PALACE.

We want to build a space where it is second nature that you would work towards your goals, where it feels perfectly NATURAL that you would make POSITIVE decisions about your hopes, dreams and ambitions.


I will start out with the LEAST CONFRONTING concept (nothing is easy in self-development, otherwise we would all be perfect versions of ourselves right?!!) and build up from that.

Are you KEEN?


Good!!

Let's break those shackles!!

#1: The Way You Do Some Things, Is The Way You Do All Things.


What does that even mean Locky, I hear you saying.

HOW does that relate to mindsets and improving our self talk?


The way you do some things, is the way you do all things.

 Sit with it for a moment if you can, repeat it to yourself in your mind a few times and, if you have a pen handy, write it down in front of you.


So, let me explain.

At first this concept didn't immediately come to me either when I was researching but, make no mistake, this is a VERY IMPORTANT concept.

The way you do some things, is the way you do all things.

In my research it became very clear that we can TRAIN our mind to be more positive and that if you repeat a pattern of behaviour over a period of time it will become ENGRAINED in your psyche.

That's why things become EASIER the MORE you do them, like public speaking, driving and, for me, writing.

As it relates here though, I am talking about habits, boundaries, expectations and setting a STANDARD.

Think about how this applies to your life, take a time audit if you will and write down all you do in your daily life.

What does your day look like, where are you spending your time and HOW are you spending your time?

Ok, have you done it?

Good.

Now, the reason I asked you to do that is because the patterns of our lives reveal us, our habits measure and define us.

What you are DOING and HOW you are doing the daily tasks have a MASSIVE impact on your mindset and how you are positioning yourself to reach your goals.


Pay attention now, I want to make this clear.

The little things MATTER!

The way you do ANY task MATTERS!



The way you do some things, is the way you do all things.



This is about FOCUS, on each and every task.

If you do the little things well, the BIG THINGS will take care of themselves and how freaking EXCITING is that?!!

This is a KEY concept and difficult to do. It will take perseverance, dedication and daily work in order to change your current patterns but it is so WORTH IT!

When I worked this concept over in my mind, I realised straight away that I was VERY guilty of rushing through tasks that I thought were not important and was settling on finishing some tasks at less than acceptable standards based on that.

I was DELIBERATELY lowering the bar of my expectations and creating a mindset that accepts less than my best!

Face Palm moment right?!!

Have a look at your list and daily activities, do you do that in any of the small tasks in your day?

Make no mistake, if you do then that sloppiness, that less than my best mentality IS a STANDARD you are SETTING.

It can be anything, it can be when you think " I don't have time for breakfast today so I will skip it or eat some cheap and greasy thing from a convenience store on my way to work" .

If you value your health WHY do that?

Do you think you will reach your goals by "skipping out"?

Get up EARLIER, spend the time MAKING a nice healthy breakfast and ENJOY it. Set the expectation that YOU DESERVE the best , start your day that way.

Perhaps, you rush through lunch at your desk, perhaps you reply to some emails less professionally than others depending on who the receiver is?

The lawn doesn't "need" to be perfect right?

That meal you are cooking can just be slapped together as it's only you it eating it right?

The house can be a bit messy because your "too tired" right?

I didn't have time to dress properly today but that's alright because it's just a one off , I'm normally dressed well right?

Or I started that book/that task but I haven't finished it for this or that reason...all perfectly valid reasons right?


Wrong.

Wrong.

Wrong.

Give everyone and everything your best, you are CULTIVATING an expectation in your mind, a standard of what you will accept.

The pattern above is that you a creating a HABIT where your mind says it is alright not to do a good job, it is alright not to reach GOALS.

And that is the worst pattern to have.

I STRUGGLE with this daily, now that I have identified this as a pattern of behavior that I need to change but we must start to change it and it does get easier.

The way we do some things, is the way we do all things.

How do we change this you might ask?

Start with just ONE task.

What task is that you ask?

It is the VERY NEXT TASK you are about to do.

Do it to the BEST of your ability, no matter WHAT it is. Heck, it could be putting your socks on or brushing your teeth.

Make a conscious DECISION that you will FOCUS and give EVERY task your BEST. You won't always succeed but it won't be long before you are starting to see your STANDARDS rise.

Your patterns will reflect a person who gives their best in everything, which goes a long way to creating a positive mindset and building a PALACE in our mind.

Remember, the way you do some things, is the way you do all things.

Give all the tasks your BEST today and let me know how you go!

Tune in for Part 2 where we will talk about how we build our life to the level of our tolerance.

LockyJ :)